Online Dating: Minefields of False Steps
Online dating can be a minefield of false steps. You have to learn how to navigate through the spam, the unwanted solicitations and the people who say they are someone and they aren’t. So, how do you know the person you are communicating with is really who they say they are? You don’t. You have to use common sense.
Common sense rules of thumb
Being the owner of an online dating site for re-singles, I have had to learn how to spot those spammers and phishers and then figure out how to deal with them. We have come up with some pretty creative ways, but more importantly, we have also come up with some common sense rules of thumb for our users to follow.
- If the person sends you a message with broken English and bad grammar, chances are they are not who they say they are! RUN FOR THE HILLS!
• If the picture is a gorgeous woman with perfect measurements wearing lingerie or a perfect looking man with abs of steel, you can pretty much guarantee that the real deal is a troll. RUN FOR THE HILLS!
• If they ask you to chat via Yahoo chat or ask you for your email address, not only don’t chat or give it to them, RUN FOR THE HILLS!
• If they ask you for money, to move in with you or for any personal information in the first contact don’t give it to them and RUN FOR THE HILLS!
• PLEASE read the profile first! Don’t just go by a picture. As tempting and flattering as it is to have the gorgeous hunk or hunkess contacting you, read first.
Always look for the signs
Many social networking and dating sites are getting wiser to these spammers and are taking measures for blocking them or calling them out. For instance, on You’re It, they have a page called Pig Busters which lists all the spammers they have on their site along with various photos they use and also give you great information on these spammers.
On Loveawake dating site, we offer background checks that our users can buy and we also have a forum topic that covers spammers and names them. We also change the spammers pictures to, yes you guessed it, a can of spam! So, they are easy to spot.
The bottom line is this when you are online dating on ANY site. Be careful of who you give out your personal information to and always look for the signs!
Writing online dating site profiles
Writing online dating site profiles is basically a tedious, masturbatory exercise in convincing people you are desirable. An avid fan of the cliche “If you can’t convince them, confuse them” strategy, mine mentions serial killers and my cat (yet not related in Jeffrey Dahmer fashion). People can then get to know me over messages or in person; as I know the truth is most men are simply scrolling through my photos deciding if I’m fuckable or not. Am I jaded? Bitch, I might be. Back to cliches. Online dating profiles are a veritable cliche minefield; it can be hard to get a true reading on a person. To make it easier for you, I’ve decoded some common sights on dating sights.
Never ever take the advice below entirely seriously
- If their profile says they are “looking for a partner in crime” you can be sure they’ve never gotten so much as a speeding ticket. Personally, I am looking for a partner to keep me outof crime.
- If they are a guy and they describe themselves as “laid-back” they are only interested in casual sex.
- If they are a girl and they describe themselves as “laid-back” they have already started a wedding Pinterest inspiration board after the first date.
- Looking for “new friends” = looking for “new friends to go down on me.”
- A profile containing only shirtless selfies taken in the bathroom mirror indicates that they are a diagnosed sociopath and/or still live with their parents.
- A profile containing only shirtless selfies taken in the bathroom mirror with their face cropped out means they are a very important person with a very important Valtrex prescription and/or are married.
- If their profile consists of only picture taken while traveling and they describe themselves as “adventurous” they wear a suit to work and work in a corporate office.
- If their profile says they are a Scorpio and “laughing about it” they check Susan Miller’s Astrology Zone eagerly each month (guilty).
- If they list that they speak Spanish (okay) they can properly order a meal at a Mexican restaurant.
- If they describe themselves as “spiritual but not religious” they mean they read a lot of self-help books.
Datum laatste wijziging: 15-02-2022